Not long ago, Bryan underwent back surgery. A couple of days beforehand, he sent a long email to me and his family with questions he'd compiled to ask the neurosurgeon. He wanted us to add any more we might come up with. Below is what I sent back. At his prompting, I’ve decided to post it. He seems to think I was kidding, and I don't know why. Most of these seem pret-ty important to me…
Can you make me fly like Superman?
Will I learn to enjoy country music so I’m not a whiny crybaby at my girlfriend’s house on Sundays?
While you're in there, can you look for some medical reason why I'm so dang awesome?
Why do my houseplants usually die?
Do you know what that super-creepy thing was in my bottle of hot sauce that once?
I think I like girls. Is that normal?
Do I dance in my sleep?
When will I be old enough to understand grown-up stuff?
Will you please remove my cervix?
If I kiss myself in the mirror, is that bad?
Does anyone say you look like Dr. Hook? May I call you Dr. Hook?
Will you hold me in your big, strong arms for a while?
Have you seen the “Talky Tina” episode of The Twilight Zone? Can we schedule a follow-up appointment to watch it together?
Is it true what they say about white people being superior?
Can I have some Kool-Aid?
Have you ever heard of that “swine flu”? Isn't that some crazy stuff?!
While you are operating, could you and the others refer to me as “this cute little feller with the body freckles”?
And could you also tell the nurses that in your medical opinion, my body was sculpted out of marble by the gods?
Why do I cry when I listen to Lou Rawls?
How comes I no talks so good?
Well...I guess that's about it. Let you know if I think of any more.
Good luck!
Jen
No comments:
Post a Comment